School is the place were every one send his children to get more knowledge. Going to school in my country it is all in the hand of the parents.The school in Syria is hard,in contrast the school in the us it is easy.Like school in Syria they do not have and used the same knowledge as the school in us use.I want to school in Syria for twelve years whereas I had no other way but to go.I want to the school in us for six years.That every one knows who short time it is for anyone to give his opinion about school in us.
It was some similarity and some different between the two schools.Like the school in us and in Syria they both have teacher for each subject, almost the school in Syria every one takes notes after the teacher as they do the same thing in us schools.Also the two school use book and note+
book to teach the student and to give them homework to do in home, and the both had to do final in the end of the school year so they be able to give each student his or her grade.
The different between they school in Syria and the school in us.School in Syria my every one have to had the same uniform not like they school in the us the do not have one uniform for the student,back in Syria schools we do not have tutoring like they have in the us school,and also they have different way of teaching and examining the student in the end of the semester.
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4 comments:
Hi Dany !
You have in interesting topic,but I think you need to write it in a
form of the paragraph.You need to use capital letters.
hi dany ... your paragraph is interesting . u have spelling mistakes like noleg (knowledge)& upanen (opinion)......U forgot to put S after take .. everyone takes note
Topic/Concluding:
Your personal information isn't necessary for in the first few sentences. You can start with Your third sentence "There are some similarities..."
Supporting Ideas:
Second sentence is a run-on sentence. End it after six years and start a new sentence.
Make each similiarity a different sentence to make your ideas more clear.
Include Syria in your paragraph when you compare it with the U.S. You only mention it in the title
Transitions/Vocabulary:
Like the both - Both have teachers for each..
See transitions on p. 127
different (adjective) What is the noun for the first sentence in your second paragraph?
Grammar/Comparitives:
Check capitalization in title
You don't need The before school in the title.
place (not pleas)
went to school
U.S.
notebook (not not book)
grade (not great)
You usually type the when you mean to use they. Check.
You need two comparatives (see chapter 4 grammar).
Intro/Concluding .10
Supporting Ideas .15
Transitions/Vocabulary .15
Grammar/Comparatives .15
See first comments
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