Feb 27, 2007
To become a Computer Engineer
It was very hard for me to decide what I am going to be in the future, but there is something I really like, something I like to work in it . It's computers. So after thinking I decided to be a computer Engineer, because It's better to study something you like than something you don't like. There are several steps I have to do before I become a computer Engineer: I have to have a high school diploma or GED . This will be easy for me , because I am going to take my GED test soon . After, I get my GED, I have to take classes in the college from four to five years. In these years I must take many different classes like drafting, chemistry, calculus, English, physics, computer science, and introduction to Engineering . After I finish five years of study. I have to take the final test . In this test they will grade me and give me the last grade I deserve. So I have to study really hard before I take this test, because the best grade I'll get in this test the best job I'll have . What I really like in this Carreer that there is almost no limit to the Carreer opportunities available to computer Engineers. I think that's one of the reasons why i choose this career beside that i like it . That's what I am going to be doing in the next five years hopefully.
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9 comments:
Murhaf Iliked your paragraph but the only thing that I suggest is that you need to check your spelling.
Murhaf, your paragraph is interesting. I would suggest you to check your contractions. For example, your sentence "I hope i 'll be easy." is confusing. Pronoun "I" is always capitalized.
Probably when you write "Carrier", you mean career.
something (u)like than. I think you not u
I think that's one of the reasons why i choose this career beside that i like it. can you told me whats that main
Your paragraph is interesting, but I want to give you some ideas.
you have some missing spelling like i is (I)is capitalize letter.
also prepositions are never capitalize in the a Title unless if it come at the first letter in a Title.(check that)
"study something u like than " It is you not u.
"i have take classes "I have to take
"i" should always be capital "I".
You have made some good changes. Your introduct
I am glad you decided on something.
You are limited to 12 sentences for this assignment. Try to see if you can take out a few unnecessary sentences.
Avoid contractions in formal writing (i.e. This'll, they'll etc.)
After I get my GED,
career doesn't need to be capitalized.
Topic/Concluding sentence: .20 Be more specific in your topic and concluding sentences. What is the main idea? Use it in each sentence.
Supporting sentences: .15 Several unnecessary sentence. Focus your ideas.
Transitions/Vocabulary: .20
Grammar/Punctuation: .15 Many incomplete sentences. Check puncutation, especially capitalization
See my first comments
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